Previously I wrote a post titled Waiting to exhale. We’ve been watching and helping my daughter with issues regarding friendships, school and growing up. It’s not pleasant watching your child suffer in any way, and as a parent you wish you could remove the source of suffering for your child. As a parent, when your child suffers – so do you. It is a tough ride, the journey changes you but there is a realisation that even though you wish you could take your child’s pain away, they need to experience it as it is their journey – their learning experience as much as it is yours.
As a parent, you realise that the small wins – such as a good day or week is something to be grateful for. It’s the realisation that you need to take it one step at a time and deal with things as they arise – helping your child to grow, learn and manage life’s hurdles. It is also a life long journey which provides growth as a parent, adult and person. You realise that your child will respond and react dependent on your choices and your reaction as a parent; an adult that your child looks up to. Your child’s guidance is your own behaviour. It becomes paramount then, as a parent, I am conscious of how I behave and how that relates to my child’s behaviour, thoughts and actions. This becomes instrumental in the way my child responds and reacts to life’s challenges.
When speaking about remaining calm, acting with compassion and tolerance – these attributes are ones I must also display. I feel words are meaningless without action. I hope to instill into my daughter, the kind of values and behaviours that we’d like the future generation to display. I’m helping my daughter manage her reactions, focus on positives and acknowledge negative feelings/ thoughts but not letting them control her behaviour/ response. Her father and I are assisting her to become more aware of when and how to manage issues before they become so overwhelming that it is hard for her to see how she can overcome them.
My daughter is an ‘old soul’, her perspective may at times, be much deeper than her friends the same age and often surprises me with her observations and responses but, at the same time she is also a child who is still feeling her way in the world. I’m still waiting to exhale but with each small step in the right direction, it feels we are making progress. When there have been bumps in the road and our progress feels as though it is “two steps forward, one step back” – I’ve come to realise that even one step in the right direction is better than none at all. Our focus at the moment is ‘one foot in front of the other’ so we may continue to Laugh. Love. Live. Peace and blessings!